the rabbit hole

I have had ridiculous amounts of free time these past few weeks and yet, I still have the hardest time convincing myself to sit in front of the computer and write. I think I may have caught some sort of anti-writing plague. I'll sit around and check Facebook. No problems there, since we all know that Facebook is the best sucker of time there is. I'll catch up on blogs. I'll read emails. I may pull up Excel and check up on the 'ol budget. But opening a Word document and working on my writing project (shhh, it's a novel, but don't tell anyone) - nah, seems to much like homework.

Now don't get me wrong, I love to write. Once I start, it's like I've fallen through the rabbit hole - I don't want to come back out. But man, is it difficult to get started. So today, I instituted the one sentence rule. I am going to write one sentence a day.

The idea - don't tell my brain this - is that I'll get swept away by my one, brilliant sentence and a mad typing frenzie will ensue.

Anyone else have this problem?

the proposal

July 4^th, 2008

Gravel crunches loudly under our feet as we cross the sunlit parking lot. Ahead, stairs beckon into the dim forest. A wooden sign announces that this is the way up to Looking Glass Rock. Ducking into the woods, our eyes slowly adjust from the piercing sunlight to a world of shadows. Occasional rays of light penetrate the gloom.

Drew and I have become Frodo and Sam, walking the ethereal wood of a different land. The trail is narrow, so we take turns leading. A small stream gurgles happily somewhere below and to the right of us. We are familiar with this trail, having hiked it many times. First, it’s a walk through the woods, followed by a long series of switchbacks that culminate with the ridge.

We reach a massive slab of rock on the ridge and throw ourselves down. Trees edge along the rock like an eager audience. The sun beats down on our bare arms. Drew rifles through the small backpack, searching for a band aid. Several years ago, he carved a message for me on this rock and took a picture of it. It was the first time he told me he loved me. Still searching for his band aid, he suggests I look for the message. I walk across the rock and there it is, facing the heavens: “Andrew loves Viktorija.” 

But there’s more. 

“Will you marry me? 7/4/08.”

I slowly turn, a smile spreading across my face, knowing that Drew will be there. Coming towards me with a sweet smile on his face, he drops to one knee, one hand grasping a small red box. He repeats the question, asking me to be his family. A tear is slowly sliding down my cheek.

“Yes, yes, YES!”

...and how would you like your coffee?

Coffee dates with a girlfriend really are the bomb.

It's an excuse to wear something slightly nicer (after all, I'll be out in the world. It's not just me and the cats anymore, so I should look semi-nice).

I get to order an iced chai. I'd been craving one for days.

I'm socializing. Yay for me! While my boredom/loneliness has ebbed away over the past few weeks, I'm still alone most of the time. So socializing is a definite plus.

Girl talk is priceless, it really is. And the tangents our conversation took - motorcycles, money, maternity shoots - ya gotta love it. And no, we really didn't just stick to the letter m.

Plus, it's Friday. And we all know that stuff is just plain better on Friday.

when it rains, it pours (in a good way)

I went to bed wayyy too late last night (or rather, this morning), which meant I raced home between jobs today for a cat nap. Unfortunately, Trix took this to mean that a cat needed to be involved. Once I convinced her that she was not a necessary ingredient to my nap (I promise you, this is The most fidgety cat you've ever met in your life), I hear her plop herself on the arm of couch as if to say, "I'm still here!" All this is to say that I'm ready to hit the sack, so this is not going to be a long or profound post.

Glad we got that out of the way.

I've been getting stuff in the mail for the past few days and I wanted to brag. Can you see my sheepish grin from all the way over there? On Monday, I come home to find not one, but TWO superb deliveries. First, my brand spankin' new Canon 35mm lens arrived! I feel slightly more "photographer-ish" now that I have something other than just my kit lens. Look out. world, I can take pictures of this bush if I darn well please because I've got a 35mm LENS. Packed neatly in two rows, I also found my new order of yarn. Huzzah! I love having a knitting project. Begone, boredom!

This last one might just be TMI, but since it's about my hubby being the sweet, thoughtful guy that he is, I'll spill the beans. We come home yesterday from a sweaty bout of tennis and I happen to glance at the mail table out in the hallway, since there were two packages sitting there. They're hardly ever for me, but since I love packages and presents, I take a look anyway. Wonder of wonders, one IS for me. I assume it's the freebie Victoria Secret perfume that Drew got for my birthday ages ago that's been on backorder. I rip open the package and out slides a strapless bra. My awesome husband, knowing that I was in desperate need of a strapless number (I'd been bemoaning the fact for at least a month, but seriously, I'm not a fan of bra shopping), had done the research online and ordered me a bra. Not only was it the right size, but it's actually awesome. Way better than something I could've picked out for myself. To top it off, he had snagged a coupon off the Internet for free panties, so tada! Two for one. Sweet!

Okay, I promised you a short post. I lied. Good night!

of train whistles and schools and thoughts on a Monday night

The train is shrilling loudly, its insistent blasts disturbing the wide sheet of inky darkness that surrounds my apartment. I think maybe the train is trying to get my attention. Of all the strange quirks that this dear old apartment has shared with us these past two and a half years, the train is what I'm going to miss the most. No, I'm not moving away. Yet. But I hope to. The hubby sent out his first two applications this past weekend (he has three more to go, but those deadlines aren't for another few months).

As far back as I can remember, if I've ever really really wanted something, I would do what I could to make it happen. But I'd also refuse to spill the beans to anyone until the thing was a done deal. I felt that if I shared my dream with people, I'd jinx it. 

i.e. Hey, I'm hoping to get a really sweet job at so-and-so and I'm psyched! Then BAM, someone else gets the job.

See, that's the way my weird mind thinks. If I tell you what I really really want, it can't possibly happen. Well, goodbye to old ideas. Hubs is applying to five schools for their accelerated nursing program (i.e. he's hoping to get a second undergraduate degree in one year). This is our back-up plan, as he first attempted to get into grad school to become a physician's assistant (PA). Apparently, everyone and their kitchen sink decided to become a PA and so the proverbial market is flooded. This means that at each school, 800 or so PA candidates are fighting tooth and nail to get into a 50+ student program.

I will love you forever if you'd keep the hubs in your thoughts and prayers as he waits to hear back from nursing schools. We're both ready for that adventure; for that second step that's been a long time in coming. Thanks muchly!

i knew i liked summer

"I had that familiar conviction that life was 

beginning over again with the summer."

- F. Scott Fitzgerald, The Great Gatsby 

on friday, i got off my butt

My persnickety roommate

I really wanted to pick up a pizza from Pizza Hut. But not just any old pizza. 

It would be a large, stuffed crust, cheesy pizza scattered with black olives. 

And maybe some green peppers. 

But hours earlier, I had come up with a cheaper & healthier solution:

a veggie burger w/the works (read: fresh lettuce, banana peppers, 

muenster cheese, as well as the usual duo, ketchup & mustard), 

pesto pasta, and pickles on the side.

yes!

But who wants to go to that effort?

It's Friday evening and I desperately wanted to be lazy

(does that make sense? Being "desperately" lazy? I didn't think so either).

But I was also lonely and bored

I'm still getting the hang of the whole being-by-myself-five-

afternoon/evenings-per-week thing.

The best medicine in the world (it ain't pretty) is doing something.

First I made a beeline for my stereo and popped in a CD. 

Bob Marley's soulful lyrics soon flooded the space.

No matter what anyone tells ya, if you're lonely, music helps a lot. For reals. 

And Marley is the ultimate in summer music.

And when I popped the first few pesto'd pieces into my mouth, 

mmmm, 

let me tell you, it was all worth it. 

The veggie burger was delic as well.